This time was different. I walked along the motorway feeling like I was barefoot hobo. Something to do with the faded colour of my shoes and the spring dress i was wearing. It was windy and made my eyes water.
It took me a long time to find the studios. When I arrived, it had the exciting feeling of a film set on lunch. People milling around wearing dressing gowns with wigs and elf ears, reading bad crime novels. Had I not bumped into the previous auditionee, I wouldnt have found my way in. Everyone eyed me suspiciously, because I didnt have a wig on, I thought. I eventually got shown into a room next door to the canteen where makeup and hair was being done. I started talking to a Spanish man, topless in a dressing gown who kept on flashing his chest at me and stretching out his body proudly. He was small and had had his hair curled to look Greek. I later found out he was a renowned dancer with the Royal Ballet, which explained his ease with his body; at the time, I thought he was just strange.
Philip Haas is directing a series of art installation pieces for an exhibition in Texas. On display will be some ancient artifacts and pictures. He is bringing them to life in film. So this week they are filming the story etched on the side of an urn and next week they are filming the marriage of Venus. I was going up, I thought, for the part of Venus. I hadn't tried to look Venus-like. I didnt know any details of the project, I thought it might be modern or anything. Philip turned up and took me into a room to talk about the film. He showed me the picture of the mural it's inspired by and asked if I was ok about topless nudity. I said I was. I noticed him glancing down at my chest, which was well hidden under a billowing, blousey, dress top.
"Fantastic!!! Well, I'm sure I can find you a part in this! Thanks so much for coming in and see you next week!!!"
I got out into that buzzing bright sunshine and walked past the cars stacked next to each other, crouching like beetles on the tarmac. What did he mean? Had I just signed myself up to being a topless extra? He wasn't offering me Venus, that was for sure. I felt confused and irritated that I hadnt got a clearer picture. Was there going to be dialogue? I felt resigned to talk it through with the agency when the offer came through.
It came through today. I had thought how depressing it was to basically be chosen because the casting director had searched 'roman actress' in google.
"Well, they really like you!" Vena is always cryptic and expecting you to jump for joy when she phones me with an offer. I dont know if she does it to everyone, but i think she does it to me because she thinks i am a baby who never gets any work.
"What do you mean? Who?"
"Er... Venus!"
"They're offering me Venus"
"Well yeah!"
"Can you check because I understood they were going to offer me something different and there is some nudity so i dont want to do it if Im not featured properly."
"OK. Toodles."
...'TOODLES'; She sounded irked that she should have to do more work and that I didnt just accept it thankfully.
"The offer isnt for Venus but it is for another good part and the nudity is only a bit of breast. If you have any problems Lucy, the casting director, said you should ring her.''
No mention of fee or engagement dates. I felt cross. I wasnt any clearer. What do you mean 'a good part', who? Should I accept it on that basis. It's one day and for 150£ I later find out, but do I get a copy of the film and is there dialogue? Im a bit confused! Should I accept it on such an unclear basis? Good people are doing it, but is that enough? He is reputable and good. OH. QUANDRY.
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